The Regimental Gazette Telegraph

Rumors

12/24/2012 12:41:00

Whispers in the dark, shadowy figures lurking about. Not for the first time

rumors surround that legendary toy-maker, Regimental Colours, LLC. Clandestine sources hint at the possibility the much anticipated "Soldier Mk II" being released, possibly this year. Such stories have been heard before, but this, your intrepid reporter, has uncovered the traces of communication with outside suppliers for hardwood figures of a new design.

As stunning as this news may seem, the Regimental workshops have, in fact, become renowned for producing spectacular marvels for the benefit of young hearts and minds. This, your intrepid reporter, has been witness to many such delights, and is happy to report on the fortunate children of intelligent parents that understand the value of these toys! They know the insidious dangers that dwell within mindless video games, and are happy to have such a tempting, wholesome, and educational alternative as Regimental Colours (tm) for their offspring. Happy will be the play rooms of 2013 when tomorrow, Christmas, they receive their new additions of Regimental Colours (tm).

Stay tuned as your man, Intrepid, digs deeper into the mysteries of Regimental Colours' (tm) "Soldier Mk II"!!!

Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!

Trademarks

07/25/2012 10:15:00

Flash message traffic from Regimental Signals Office-

Message begins-

The Regimental HQ has learned today that the US trademark and Patents Office.has issued trademark status for "Regimental Colours". This means the Regiment now has some protection and bona fides.

Message ends-

Copy, duty officer

Regimental Signals Office

New Advert Running

06/27/2012 10:59:00

The Regiment announces it is running a new banner advert on The Miniatures Page website. It is fervently hoped that those who understand gaming will appreciate the Regimental offerings. What an excellent and irresistible way to introduce the young to the fascinating (and educational) world of war-gaming!

New Creation from the Regiment

11/15/2011 14:45:00

Rumors abound regarding yet another mechanical marvel coming from the secret workshops of legendary toy manufacturer, Regimental Colours, LLC. Seeking to confirm these whispers, your intrepid reporter secreted himself near the Regiment's firing range, and settled down to wait.

Early in the afternoon of Sunday, the 13th of November, a great rumbling sound arose, the very earth did tremble as the monster siege engine was rolled out of the workshops and into position. Many burly men were required to harness the beast's mighty power, yet eventually the great arm was hauled down and secured. A captain of artillery held the lanyard as others moved off a safe distance. From where this reporter had ensconced himself, could be heard the cry of "ready!" then a pause, then, "Loose!" There was a hush as the arm began its arching accent, then a great clang and rattle as the arm was arrested by the cross member, the whole engine kicking wildly, and the missile flew about 6 feet. After a few more shots, the engineers conferred and the "Onager" (the Roman word for "wild ass", for this is how the engine truly behaved) was trundled into the workshops once more.

Thinking this the end, your gallant reporter was ready to depart, when the engine was trundled out to the range again. A new throwing arm was plain to see. Amazing the resourcefulness of this operation! Once more the mighty beast was positioned, the arm hauled down, the range cleared. There was the again the cry of "Ready!" and then, "Loose!" This time the missile doubled its range, achieving 12 feet or more. There was much jubilation 'round the secret halls of the Regiment after that!

Stay tuned for all the latest insider information from this, your intrepid reporter.

Regiment establishes advanced positions!

08/16/2011 10:06:00

In an unexpected and bold maneuver, the Regiment has sent out a reconnaissance in force to the San Francisco Bay Area. The small but well equipped formation has gained a foothold in the city of Berkeley over the weekend, at an establishment known as Mr. Mopps. The engagement took almost two hours, but the force seems to be well dug in. The venue thus occupied is a toy and book store specializing in the more intelligent sort of children's toys. It has been a fixture of the Berkeley community for generations.

Though the current lodgment is small, the Regimental Command hopes to expand and consolidate it's position. Reinforcements are set to arrive next Sunday. With the cache' of Mr. Mopps, it is hoped other retailers will express interest, and more formations will be dispatched. This is an exciting time for the Regiment, and we wish the High Command all the best!

Stay tuned to the Regimental Gazette Telegraph for all the latest on all things Regimental!

Patents Pending

05/06/2011 16:13:00

Regimental Colours, LLC passed a milestone today, applying for its first ever patent. This is in regards to the as-yet super-secret rocket project, information on which is only just begining to leak out.

The patent concerns the toy rocket, which features an expolding warhead - no mean feat considering only wood and rubber bands are used, no chemicals, batteries, nor flashing lights.

Of course, this has always been the company's Achilie's heal - kids love it but parents just don't get it if it doesn't beep, flash, or shatter into plastic shards after 3 days.

Though the process is just begun, The Regimental can now add "Patents Pending" to its much-deserved Battle Honors.

Three cheers!

Rockets seen firing at Regimental Workshops!

04/28/2011 13:04:00

Dateline 28 April, 2011

Almost nightly, the "rocket's red glare" can be seen above the super-secret workshops of Regimental Colours. Yes indeed, rockets! These phenomenal toys are capable of flying across a toy battle field and detonating on impact. That is correct, with nothing but wood and rubber bands, the creative forces of the Regiment have forged a mechanical marvel! Regimental commanders and toy enthusiasts will want to keep a wary eye for these and all the other wonders available at the Regimental Shoppe! As always your intrepid investigative reporter will keep you posted on further developments,

Appropriateness?

04/20/2011 11:25:00

Study after study shows that the toys children play with (e.g. toy guns or soldiers, any except video games) have NO bearing on abhorrent behavior. The only factor is the behavior of the adults that the children have to model. Studies also show that toys like Regimental Colours, LLC are excellent for the development of mind and body: motor skills, interest in history, math skills. And the children love them! Why then will parents purchase a brain-destroying video game at three times the price, rather than something good for their children, that will last longer and is less expensive?

Calling all Regimental Commanders!

10/28/2010 11:39:00

Pass the word! Anyone with a collection of Regimental Colours, no matter what the size, the Regiment's Quartermaster would like to hear from you!

Please write and tell us the size and composition of your forces. A location would be helpful too. For example:

PJA, Sacramento

Cavalry, five squadrons (brigaded)

1st, 2nd Florentine Light Horse

3rd Red Lancers

4th Irregular Arab Horse

5th Squadron Black Dragoons

Foot, five battalions (brigaded)

1st, 2nd, 3rd Scott's Guards

4th, 5th, 6th Zouaves

7th, 8th, Neapolitan Guard

9th Jager

Four pieces artillery

1 light cannon

1 medium cannon

1 heavy cannon

1 mountain howitzer

New format

10/28/2010 11:19:00

The Regimental Gazette, that stalwart of journalistic excellence, is introducing a new format for its news and reviews of all things concerning that fabled toy manufacturer, Regimental Colours, LLC. While your intrepid reported will continue to serve humbly by supplying the very best investigative reporting, now YOU, the Regiment's faithful, will have the opportunity to chime in and render your own good service to all concerned.